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507: Robyn Gobbel on Dealing with Big Baffling Behaviors
One of the myths of adoption is the now debunked “blank slate” theory that if you get your baby early enough, they won’t have experienced any trauma. And therefore, you won’t be raising a child with a trauma history, and you won’t be dealing with big, baffling behaviors.
We know better now. We know that stress during a pregnancy affects not only the mom, but also the baby. We know that relinquishment itself causes the trauma of separation. What effect does such stress and trauma have on a developing nervous system? Often, the result is big, baffling behaviors for which most of the tools in our parenting toolbox are wholly inadequate.
Oh, dear friends. If I’d had the body of work from Robyn Gobbel as a resource when I was in the throes of parenting, what a difference it would have made. Instead of trying to control someone else’s behavior – my child’s, their birth parent's, my own, even – I would have had a completely different outlook on getting compliance and on connection and regulation. I’ll tell you, though. I have listened to every episode from today’s guest for the past several years, and in incorporating a new way of understanding neuroscience and relationships (which Robyn makes super accessible), I am experiencing a new sense of ease in my relationships with everyone: my young adult children, my husband, my family members and friends, and especially myself.
Robyn Gobbel is a therapist, researcher, podcaster, bestselling author, teacher of therapists, and space holder for parents who find themselves challenged by big baffling behaviors. You probably already know of Robyn’s work, and if you don’t, prepare to be blown wide open…in the best way.
Show Notes
Host- The Baffling Behavior Show podcast
Creator- Being With {an immersion course for parenting professionals}
Creator- The Club {a virtual community for parents of kids with big, baffling behaviors}
Author- Raising Kids with Big Baffling Behaviors: Brain-Body-Sensory Strategies that Really Work
Ep 207: Jen Winkelmann on what an adoption-competent therapist thinks you should know (mentioned)
Transcript
About this Podcast
Lori Holden (The Open-Hearted Way to Open Adoption: Helping Your Child Grow Up Whole) brings to you an array of articulate and thought-provoking guests with lived experience in adoption, each with valuable insights to share about the all-encompassing journey of parenting an adopted person from babyhood to toddlerhood to school age to teenage -- and ultimately to adulthood. Join us as we explore Adoption: The Long View.
Named a Top 25 Adoption Podcast
