206: From Infertility Grief To Adoption

No baby should be born with a job, to quote Dr Phil. It’s just too much to expect a baby to fix anything -- a relationship, a heart, a life. But many people come to infant adoption after experiencing infertility and enduring some sort of loss. They might think that finally getting a baby and filling their empty arms will heal all the hurt. And it does heal some of the hurt. Adopting a baby does resolve parenting, but it does nothing to address the wounds of infertility.

Grief doesn't go away on its own; it needs to be addressed and processed. But how? Today’s guest is an expert on one way to do that. Anne Heffron is the daughter of parents who hadn’t worked through their feelings of inadequacy and insecurity, their grief and loss. Parents who couldn’t talk about adoption when Anne tried to bring it up with them. Anne wrote through her own big emotions one summer a few years ago, resulting in her memoir You Don't Look Adopted. Since then, her Write or Die! method has had a profound impact helping others heal their wounded places and make way for their next chapter. Here is Anne Heffron on clearing grief to make way for a baby.

Show Notes:

Anne’s website: anneheffron.com

Anne’s book: You Don’t Look Adopted

Anne on Instagram

Read: A cautionary tale for adoptive mothers

Read: my review of You Don’t Look Adopted

Watch: Anne and I unpack an adoption app, the ”Tinder” of adoption.

Transcript

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About this Podcast

Lori Holden (The Open-Hearted Way to Open Adoption: Helping Your Child Grow Up Whole) brings to you an array of articulate and thought-provoking guests with lived experience in adoption, each with valuable insights to share about the all-encompassing journey of parenting an adopted person from babyhood to toddlerhood to school age to teenage -- and ultimately to adulthood. Join us as we explore Adoption: The Long View.

Named a Top 25 Adoption Podcast